I did it. I woke up one morning last week, picked out a typewriter, and hit “Purchase” with butterflies in my tummy and anticipation in my heart. I cannot remember the last time I made such a frivolous purchase on an item just for me. Just for the pleasure of having it. Just because I really, really, really wanted it and had lusted after it and knew it would bring me endless amounts of joy to be able to use it.
Meet Willow.
My beautiful Olivetti Studio 44. I was feeling poorly the day she arrived, but that didn’t stop me from tearing into the box as soon as Arlen dropped it on our bed where I was comforting myself with cozy, bookshop vibes via You’ve Got Mail (a movie I had never seen up until that day—where have I been??).
Taking her out of the box, chills immediately erupted all over my body. I felt like a little kid again, ready to type whatever fantastical ideas might pop into my head. I settled for the standard “Hello” over and over again, just to get a feel for how Willow would move. And let me tell you . . . that clacking sound of the keys, the steady movement of the paper from right to left filled me with more joy than I could’ve possibly imagined. It was everything I had hoped it would be!
Fast forward to one week ago, where we had our first real test of patience together, Willow with me and me with Willow.
But first, some context.
I had set out the night before to write a poem. A poem to Willow. Named for one of my favorite trees which just so happens to be laden with symbolism, steadily built throughout the centuries. Did you know that there are over 400 species of Willow in the world? And that is shares linguistic roots with the word witch? They were believed to have connections with wisdom, mystery, death, and the afterlife; are symbolic of renewal and immortality; and they are associated with healing grief, especially grief of a broken heart.
There is so much to this tree that inspires me, it felt like the perfect name to bestow upon my new typewriter. And an even better subject to write a poem to her about.
So, I woke up that morning all ready to dive in. I had a few lines already floating around but wanted to learn a bit more about Willow’s background. I read one book about the magical symbolism that led me to another book about Greek Mythology, and by the early afternoon, I had everything ready to type up my poem, including some beautiful, handmade paper.
And then I started typing. . .
This is when everything seemed to go awry. For every line I typed, an ugly smudge of ink settled across the page, rendering the words illegible. Each of the lines were improperly spaced, some too close to one another, some too far apart. Not to mention, I couldn’t seem to get the margins justified, no matter how hard I tried. And then the ribbon just up and leapt from it’s metal holder and wouldn’t stay in place for who-knows-what-reason.
I should note, this typewriter didn’t come with a manual. It came with a beautiful case, a missing Q key, and some extra ribbon, but no manual, and one of my toxic traits is simply diving in to projects without too much forethought (my other toxic trait is postponing projects because I am giving it too much forethought).
Thus began our multi-hour process of getting to know one another. In that time, I learned how to fix my ribbon and properly secure it to its metal guide. I learned that I could actually reverse the way in which the ribbon feeds through the typewriter, something I didn’t even know was a necessary and useful trick to know. I learned that the paper needed to be fed underneath a paper bail in order to keep it secured while the typewriter moves and to prevent the ink smudging problem I was fretting over. I learned how to adjust the key strike pressure and how to set the margins as well as line spacing properly so that it was always consistent.
Needless to say, I learned a lot about Willow over the course of that afternoon, which made my poem feel all the more right to write that very day.
It may not have come out perfectly—I still have a long way to go with finding the correct typing speed and learning the keys to avoid mistakes—but writing this poem was incredibly fulfilling. I hope that you might enjoy it, too:
GrievingDancingBEING with Willow
Wispy leaves flittering through the cooling breeze. I wind my fingers deftly around your fragile, agile limbs. You're always twisting bending shaping While I'm sat here breaking breaking breaking Gazing up through the magic of your leaves I can't help but Wonder: Did Orpheus draw you here or was it you who charmed he? As you have already done me. I lay across the grass so pluch and feel a rhythmic sort of rush. If I drop my burden of worries at your feet . . . If I cut my arm and plant it with your soul . . . Will a new form of us -- bound together -- grow? My questions remain unanswered, but my hear feels lighter still. So I'll stay here sat beneath your swaying spell.
Author Events + Fall Markets
I am still waiting to hear back from a few events that I’ve applied for, but as of right now, you can find me and my books on the two dates below:
I am so excited to be participating with 29 other super talented authors at this event to showcase our work and support the local library! I will have my debut novel with me to share, but I have a feeling I might be walking away with a ton of other books by the end of the day, too.
This will be my first fair event in nearly 10 years! I used to do fairs all the time, selling my handmade clothing and small goods. So I am thrilled to be back at it, this time, sharing my book collection, but also handmade, bookish gifts such as candles, simmer pots, bookmarks, & tea towels. I plan to put a spooky/ cozy spin on everything for this particular event. I’ve even made myself a special, halloween-style dress to wear.
Find me on Fable!
I have recently joined Fable and am SO excited for it. If you've not yet heard of this app, it’s basically a beautiful combination between Instagram and Goodreads, but geared entirely towards sharing all things books, books, books, and I love it. It's incredibly low stress and set up in a way that I get a sneak peek into other book-lovers lives, the books they are reading, and the clubs they are joining. If you join*, feel free to find me under B.A. Franc.
*I am not affiliated with Fable, but they do offer referral credits towards ebooks. So if you happen to sign up, you and I would both get $5 towards an ebook. But regardless, I just think it's a cool app that I thought I would share :)
The Cats
International Cat Day just recently passed, and I just wanted to share a few photos of my cats (again) because they light up our world, even when they are getting on our nerves. We wouldn’t trade them for anything.
And while I have you here, cooing over these precious babies, I thought I’d ask. . . what is it you’d like to see more of in this newsletter? Less of? I’d love to hear from you. Right now, I really do just kind of wait or inspiration to strike to write but if there is a topic you’d like for me to touch on, please let me know either in the comments or by hitting Reply.
Currently Reading
I dropped by the library this past week to return my book club book, You’d Look Better as a Ghost (which I surprisingly LOVED) only to walk out with three more titles that caught my eye. I have no idea what I was thinking as I am not a super speedy reader, so I doubt I will be able to finish all three before the two week borrow limit is up. Here’s to hoping no one puts a hold on any of these so I might extend my borrow limit!
I am also nearly halfway through with Nikita Gill’s novel-in-verse, The Girl and the Goddess, which I have mixed feelings about. The story itself is absolutely beautiful with strong, feminist themes. However, I am not entirely sold on the story being told through poems, namely because many of the poems don’t feel like poems?
I’ve talked about this with a friend and we both agreed that poetry is one of those incredibly subjective things, each operating on it’s own frequency. And only if you carry that same frequency will you possibly relate to it on the deepest of levels. Which likely explains why I absolutely LOVED every one of Rupi Kaur’s poems in Milk & Honey, even the ones I didn’t quite understand. They spoke to me on a very deep level and made me feel all sorts of things I couldn’t always name.
Book Reviews
We’ve got loads of new reviews this week, so I’m just going to dive right in!
All the Ways We Said Goodbye by Beatriz Williams, Lauren Willig, & Karen White
In All The Ways We Said Goodbye, Beatriz Williams, Lauren Willig and Karen White team up to bring us an epic tale of three women connected through time, love, heartbreak and war with the Ritz Paris as their silent witness.
These three women, spanning across three generations, have more than just The Ritz in common. Though it bore witness to an important part in all of their lives, it’s the sacrifices they made that make them kindred hearts. All of them loved and lost, but most importantly, they learned how to move on from their losses, be it for the greater good or for themselves.
Even though the premise of the novel is set up as three different love stories, All the Ways We Said Goodbye reads like a mystery thriller as clues are set up and we follow the trail to uncover unforeseen secrets. . . Continue Reading
All’s Well by Mona Awad
Miranda is a drama professor attempting to direct a production of All’s Well That Ends Well in Mona Awad’s latest novel, All’s Well. An acting instructor whose own acting career was cut short by a crippling fall from a stage, Miranda lives stewing in bitterness. She’s in constant pain due to a bad hip surgery from her fall and bad subsequent therapy. She’s been to several different doctors and therapists and none have helped — some actually worsened her pain.
To make matters worse, the kids in her acting class hate her. They’ve been petitioning to do a rendition of Macbeth instead, to which Miranda has refused — with a smile on her face, of course. Despite the chronic pain that barely allows her a moment’s rest, pain which has been suggested is all in her mind, Miranda still shows up to work every day and tries her best to be complacent — even if it is through gritted teeth. She knows her colleagues will have little to no sympathy for her pain . . . Continue Reading
Family of Origin by CJ Hauser
CJ Hauser’s Family of Origin revolves around Nolan and Elsa Grey, two siblings who head off to Leap’s Island after learning their father, Ian Grey, has drowned in the surrounding waters. Leap’s Island is a tiny island in the Gulf of Mexico that can only be reached by riding the postal boat once a week, where there is no internet access and no contact with the outside world. It is the place their father retired to after he and a group of scientists, who called themselves the Reversalists, discovered a certain type of duck, better known as the bufflehead, was showing signs that evolution is on the reverse and the world as they know it is coming to an end. It’s this outlandish theory that ostracizes them and sends these washed-up scientists to create and live in their own bubble at Leap’s Island, where they focus on studying the bufflehead full-time. Elsa and Nolan are only there to understand the aspects of their father’s death, as Elsa suspects he might’ve killed himself, incited possibly by a shameful mistake made in the past that tore their family apart . . .Continue Reading
The Gift of Anxiety by Diante Fuchs, MA
The biggest, most positive takeaway I received from this book was a simple reframing of my relationship with anxiety, and for that I am forever grateful.
I am someone who has "struggled" with anxiety since my teens. It has waxed and waned throughout the years, sometimes giving me a break for a string of months on end. But recently, I've dealt with two forms of "stuck" anxiety as the author likes to call it: anxiety ABOUT anxiety and medical/ health anxiety. Super fun, totally recommend.
Most recently, my anxiety about anxiety has revolved around my inability to sleep. So this book really couldn't have come at a better time . . . Continue Reading
Until next time,
B.A. Franc